Ten Reasons Why

Today someone asked, “Krispy Kremes? What are they?”
What are they??? Krispy Kremes are only the manna of the gods!
Krispy Kremes are the most sublime doughnuts you will ever experience. There simply isn’t a better doughnut known to man, and anyone who says otherwise is just plain WRONG, dammit. WRONG WRONG WRONG! Please don’t even bring up Dunkin’ Donuts. That’s like comparing a Hyundai to a Jaguar.
Krispy Kreme is a Southern thing, but over the last 5 years or so, though, they’ve expanded out of the South and are available in about 30 states now. There’s even one in Port Authority in NYC. (Yankees love Krispy Kremes!) Krispy Kreme, Inc. also had a great IPO earlier this year. Trading as , the stock has doubled since April.
There’s nothing like coming up on the Krispy Kreme store just as the neon “Hot Doughnuts Now” sign lights up. Through a glass window you watch the cashier walk into the back and take your fresh, hot doughnuts off the conveyor belt*. There’s no doughnut like a hot Krispy Kreme Original Glazed — an amazingly light, sweet yeast dough coated in a still dripping sugary glaze. The only thing that comes close is a cooled Krispy Kreme Original Glazed, when the glaze actually does get crispy — not crunchy- crispy, but sugary-crispy.
* The Krispy Kreme doughnut making machine is an amazing thing that has to be seen. Imagine an auto assembly plant converted to making sweet doughnuts! The apparatus has actually been placed in the Smithsonian’s Museum of American History a few years ago since it was one of the first machines of mass food production. Luckily, at the time it was unveiled at the museum I was sharing a house with the food critic for Washington CityPaper, who was invited to the Krispy Kreme reception. We were flush with Krispy Kreme doughnuts for a week!!
I even know a couple who had their first date at Krispy Kreme, so, when they eventually got married they had a Krispy Kreme-catered wedding!
In the South, they’re cultural icons. You can’t escape them, especially because Krispy Kreme has an amazing fund-raising market. Original Glazeds are also mass-produced for sale in grocery stores, but also for fund- raising events for high school marching bands, sports teams, etc. The kids take orders by the dozen (used to be for like $2/dozen when I was in high school; probably closer to $4 now), then buys the boxes of a dozen Original Glazed in bulk at about half that price. The days when the boxes showed up at the school for delivery were amazing. Everyone was walking around the halls with two dozen Krispy Kremes, stuffing four doughnuts in their mouths during the five minute break between classes, then shaking all the way through Algebra from the sugar rush.
Ahhhh, Krispy Kremes. One of the best things in life . . .

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Ooh. I’ve by . Increased hits, here I come.
Who needs all those bastards on the left? ;-)

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Okay, so now it works again. And the blogs that have been sitting in the queue are now live. Whew.

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So every now and again, Blogger just quits working for me. I try to publish the blogs, and it just cranks away and cranks away, never FTPing anything to the site. I give it a few days, and it starts functioning again. So one more try here . . . .

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Been absent. Been on the road — Oklahoma and Connecticut in the last week. Lots of time in planes and hotels. Lousy dial-up hotel connections make it so annoying to be online for anything except the essentials. Mindspring’s service has degraded since it was bought by Earthlink.
I’m off the road for a few weeks, so maybe I’ll have time to pull my life back together. Travelling on business as much as I do has decimated my social life (not that I had an expansive social life to begin with). Different cities every week leave you unfocused. I sometimes wake up in a hotel and have a hard time remembering which city I’m in. I can never remember where I was three weeks ago — it has all blurred together. And it makes keeping up with the day-to-day life management stuff — getting car licenses renewed, buying a couch, cleaning the kitchen floor, etc. even more of a drag than they normally are.
So blog that.

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Let’s be clear: I loathe golf. I’ve played maybe three times and found it to be annoying and frustrating. Only bowling ranks as more boring as a spectator sport. (Well, there’s that Canadian thing with pucks on ice and brooms which is just ridiculous, but we can’t even count that as a sport. It’s like sweeping the frozen pond or some such nonsense.)
So why did I just spent the last few hours watching the end of the PGA Championship? Two words: Tiger Woods.
Sometimes a person is so good at something, just so phenomenally perfect at what they do, so far ahead of the rest of the pack, that you can’t help but watch because excellence all by itself is captivating. Tiger Woods turns something I loathe into something I can’t bear not to watch. How can anyone not appreciate this kid who this week made Jack friggin’ Niklaus ask “How does he do that?” And you know what — he sucked in this tournament. He nearly lost it in a tie breaker with Bob May. I mean, the guy put the ball on the cart path two out of three of the tie breakers and still won the tournament.
It’s exciting because I think we are looking at the best competitor alive today in any sport — and perhaps in any field. No one — no one — is better at what they do than Tiger Woods is at golf. It’s not about golf anymore. It’s about reminding us poor human sacks of meat how good we actually can be.

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Okay. After her speech at the Democratic Convention last night, I decided I’ve got a big crush on Al’s daughter, Karenna Gore.
Sigh.
Yeah, yeah, I know technically it’s Karenna Gore Schiff. That damn Schiff guy got to her before I did. What’s he got that I don’t have? Besides an M.D. And a lot of money. And less time on his hands.
In addition to breastfeeding [Ed.: no comment] and running GoreNet, a pro-Gore organization “for young people,” apparently, Karenna’s, like, the Britney Spears of Young Democrats. All these Young Dems at U. of Georgia had their picture taken with her. How jealous am I?

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Funny anarchists! [from this morning's Washingon Post].
Anarchists are just so silly.
(I’ll probably get bombed for saying that.)

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My laptop made it home this afternoon. Since I hadn’t seen it since Wednesday afternoon, it and I sat around this evening and shot the shit over a scotch. Apparently, it had a lot more fun than I did the last week (it hooked up with some hot little PDA en route back from DFW). It’s in the shower cleaning up now; three days in the Hertz lost-and-found vault and an overnighter in a FedEx plane don’t do a lot for body odor. (Don’t tell it I said that. It’s sensitive about the odor issue.)

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I love FedEx, if for no other reason than you can track your package’s jaunts across the country. My roving laptop (see the 8/13 post below) is making it’s way back to me. So far it has visited Irving, TX, and Dallas, TX. This morning it’s in Indianapolis, IN. Hell, even I’ve never been to Indianapolis — but my laptop has!

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